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School Days Chuckles

Teacher: Why are you late to class? Student: Class started before I got here!
Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.
Teacher: If you had just one day to live, where would you go? Student: I would spend my last day in school. It feels like forever!
What did one pencil say to the other pencil? You're looking sharp!
Teacher: Why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor? Student: You told me not to use tables.
Why did the student bring a ladder to class? Because he wanted to go to high school!
Teacher: If you had just one wish, what would it be? Student: To be done with school.
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.
Teacher: Can you use "harassment" in a sentence? Student: I can't concentrate with all this "hair-ass-ment" around me.
Why did the scarecrow become a successful teacher? Because he was outstanding in his field!
What do you call someone who steals energy? A jolt thief.
Teacher: Why are you chewing gum in class? Student: Well, you said we should always have a snack during a test!
Why did the computer go to school? To improve its byte!
Teacher: Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday? Student: Yesterday, today, and tomorrow.
What did one wall say to the other wall at school? "I'll meet you at the corner."
Teacher: Why are you not doing your homework? Student: Because I don't want to add to my teacher's already heavy workload!
Why did the student bring a ladder to class? Because he wanted to go to high school!
What's a math teacher's favorite place in NYC? Times Square.
Why did the student wear glasses in math class? To improve di-vision.
Teacher: If you had just one day to live, where would you go? Student: I would spend my last day in school. It feels like forever!